FMA Randomness
by xRaiMoonsAbyss
Summary: Rated T just in case. Random things happen on random occasions when you're a dog of the military. On HIATUS
1. Milk Plus Ed Equals Not So Pretty

Me: Fullmetal Alchemist randomness fun!

Edward: Blah blah, get on with it

Me: Cool it shorty

Edward: WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SMALL THAT IF SOMEONE WHERE TO ZOOM IN ON THEM WITH A MAGNIFYING GLASS THEY STILL WOULDN'T BE SEEN MY THE NAKED EYE?

Me: No one specifically, in fact, I don't remember saying that

Edward: That's it I'm out of here!

Roy: Moon'sEclipse definitely doesn't own Fullmetal Alchemist

Edward: That's right she doesn't! There's a whole lot of things she doesn't own. And she never will. SO IN YOUR FACE YOU STUPID AUTHOR!

Me: What's there to be rubbed in my face short stuff? As long as I don't own an anime show, I will be able to torture the hell out of you in my fics! So shut your trap, you know, the one as big as Mustang's ego!

Roy: Must you bring me into this?

Me & Ed: SHUT UP MUSTANG!

Roy: -SIGH- Well, no use in getting involved, let's change scenes shall we?

--------------------------Fullmetal Alchemist Randomness fun

A/N: Yea well, this really just follows he beginning plot for FMA where they're still searching for the stone and what not. So, yea...

**Randomness chapter 1: Milk Ed Not So Pretty**

**Ed's POV**

'Ah Central. Such a lovely place with beautiful scenery. Ah yes, Central. One of the places where EVERYBODY JUST DECIDES NEVER TO SHUT THE HELL UP, AND WHERE THERE IS NO PEACE AND QUIET! Yes, what a wonderful place indeed.'

"Brother, shouldn't we report to the colonel?"

"I was planning on doing that Al. But, maybe a bit later." I replied. That bastard had sent me on another wild goose chase. I swear, he enjoys making me run around doing his dirty work. Turns out, the bastard sent me just to calm a bunch of revolting soldiers. What does he think I am anyway?

-------------------------Mustang's Office

**General POV**

"So, find anything about the stone Ed?" Mustang asked.

"Nope, I didn't. And you knew I wouldn't. You only sent me to calm those revolts. And now you have the nerve to ask if I found anything?" a steamed Ed replied.

"Now, now, Ed. How would I know that there would be revolts there? I don't have everything on a leash you know." Mustang replied slyly.

'Pft, yea right...' thought Ed.

"Oh, and for your very hard work, here!" Hughes said running in with a blue colored thermal cup.

"What's this?" Ed asked.

"Why, it's a drink to welcome you from the harsh, outside, cold, weathers. And something to reward you for your hard work." said Hughes as he smirked. Mustang smirked too, but Ed failed to notice. Ed took the cup and drank.

"Hot chocolate?" Ed asked.

"Correct Fullmetal. Glad to see that you know the distinct taste of it." Mustang said.

"Tastes good. What's in it?" Ed asked.

"Well, chocolate mix, marshmallows, a hint of cinnamon, whipped cream, and... milk." Mustang and Hughes answered. (Lol, Roy and Maes teamwork)

"I see, well it tastes reall- Wait, d-d-did you j-j-just say m-m-m-m-milk?" a horrified Ed asked. The expression on his face was priceless. Maes even managed to snap a picture of it.

"Yes, we did Fullmetal. It's also very nice to see that your hearing is functional as well."

Mustang answered.

"AAAAAAAAAH! How could you give me something as disgusting as milk? You don't know how many germs and bacteria could be there. I mean, it comes from a cows utter for god's sake! Oh god, what the hell ever gave you this idea?????" Ed asked going into a little fit.

"Well Ed, you didn't ask us what was in it before you drank it did you?" Mustang asked.

"That's it." Ed replied. "This is where I draw the line."

------------------------3 days later

"Make sure you don't miss that one either Colonel. Hughes, there's one with your name sitting right over there." Ed said grinning. Somehow, Ed managed to get quite a few gallons of milk that had not been pasteurized. And then, he poured all of it into cups. And now, Hughes and Mustang were to drink every single drop in every single glass of unpasteurized milk. Well, that shows them to mess with Ed.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0Fin

Chappy one complete. Me would like reviews so I have enough confidence for next chappy. Nah, review if you feel like it. I'll update even if you don't so yea.

Hughes: She wants you to review... she really does

Mustang: I think I'm going to throw up...

Ed: If you do, I'll have plenty more of this stuff waiting for you

Hughes & Mustang: Oh god no.


	2. Enjoying Edkuns Tantrums

Me: OMG! I haven't update this story in…..uh…

Edward: about 2 months…….

Me: OMG! SERIOUSLY?!

Edward:…..Moon'sEclipse does not own FMA

**FMA RANDOMNESS CHAPPY 2 COMMENCE!**

-Enjoying Ed-kun's Tantrums-

Eh, slight RoyxEd, you no like, then you no read….

BAM. Ed barged into the colonel's office, angry……again. 

"Can I help you Ed?" Mustang asked smirking that look-at-me-I-did-something-that-made-Ed-mad! smirk.

"YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHY I'M HERE YOU BASTARD!" Ed yelled.

"Hm, no, I'm afraid I don't." Mustang replied.

"YOU…..YOU……..YOU SENT ME A GIFT!!" Ed yelled.

"And what's so wrong with that Ed?" Mustang asked, eyebrow raised.

"It, you, box, me, larger than, taller, card, insult, kaboom!" Ed muttered.

"Huh?" Mustang asked.

"YOU SENT ME A PRESENT THAT WAS **TALLER **THAN ME….AND WHEN I FINALLY GOT TO THE TOP OF THE BOX TO OPEN IT….THERE WAS A CARD THAT SAID GOOD JOB ON REACHING IT…AND THEN IT BLEW UP!" Ed yelled. "WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU DO THAT YOU BASTARD?"

"Because it's fun seeing you mad, you're cute and entertaining that way…." Mustang replied, head in a document.

Footsteps. More footsteps…..whack!

"Ouch, what was that for?" Mustang yelled.

"Seeing you mad is also enjoyable colonel bastard!" Ed yelled as he stormed off, a tinge of pink on his cheeks.

-FIN

Sorry if it sucked. I just felt bad about not posting anything in about 2 months. Well, Ja! Moon'sEclipse


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